George Elliot is a woman, idiot!

At church on Sunday I had to sit through an insufferably long and tedious sermon while simultaneously reminding my youngest that the church pews were not a jungle gym. What made it tedious was the total lack of inflection or expression in the speaker's voice. But the biggest offense was that the priest referred to George Elliot as the "man who wrote 'Middlemarch'. George Elliot! A man! I wanted to scream out in frustration right then and there but my husband gave me the stink eye so I kept my peace. Probably would have spoiled someone's First Communion. Afterwards, he made me promise not to bring the subject up again, including emailing the offending party. There was fine print involved because I have a reputation.


I am one of those people who cannot help but right a wrong. People who make mistakes, especially if they are being decidedly pompous about it, need to be told. I am the first to speak up to people who make ridiculous statements ("Madonna is not her real name, you know") and I am more than happy to take a bully aside, a la Rebecca De Mornay in "The Hand that Rocks the Cradle", and give them the direction they so clearly need.


Of course this quality makes my husband a tad nervous. He is afraid of public embarrassment and he is terrified that I will pick a fight with the wrong person, forcing him to step in physically to defend me. I sympathize but, like I said, I just can't help myself. I'd like to think that Mary Anne Evans would be proud.